Most times it’s always in the dead of night when all peaceful, law abiding citizens are deep in repose.
It matters not if you’re ready for them or not
The sneak in every month end, stealthy little fuckers who don’t make the customary noises you’re used to from your device.
Like the saying goes, the only certain things in life are Death and Taxes.
I say the only sure things in Life are death, taxes and Direct Debit alerts!
Omo, my tired is tired.
It’s 4.30 am on the first day of a new month and like most other days, my insomniac routine kicks in. After re-booting and calibrating myself, I pick up my phone to see how much sleep i managed to put away
Unlike most other days however, the notification bar is absolutely popping off!!
Before I can fully process or remember what day it is, I slide it down and sigh.
An increased number of ‘’happy new month’’ WhatsApp messages mixed with all the usual message notifications from the groups I’ve stubbornly clung to (Despite Chioma’s threats), a medley of other app notifications, Google reminders and du dun dun….. The amazingly long drop down list of Direct Debit alerts from my HSBC account.
Insert deep hiss and weary sigh.😩😩😩
I mean, can’t somebody catch a break? Don’t I have one unknown ancestral relation who has decided to will me an Island in the Caribbean?
Yes, I already know what you’re going to ask and the answer is NO.
There’s no option of me choosing NOT to set up debit alerts because all the items which are being paid off are mission critical to survival over here in the UK. Unfortunately (lol), the responsible thing to do is to set up payments for them all and move on with life. Being a responsible someborry as i was taught to be, this is the most logical option.
Doesn’t stop it from being very annoying sha.
Council tax, car loan repayment, Insurance payment, car tax, electricity bill, Water bill, Rent, phone bill, WIFI payment,...Aaaarrrghhhh!!.. There’s one really really annoying one that comes quarterly. TV License bill. Can you just imagine? Actually paying the government to watch your own tv o!!. Like i said, If not for doing the responsible thing, (and Chioma’s knife-on-my-throat insistence)..wetin concern me and TV licence payment?
Bruh, if you see me anytime, biko press some forex into my hand. Life adiro easy at all.
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