Mma Gracie...

 

2020. The year that keeps on taking.

My grandmum, Ma Grace Ejiogu has passed on to glory. Sigh.

Seems like people always reach out and tell you there’s no reason to mourn, as the person in question lived to a very ripe age of 95 and that it should be a celebration of life instead. I understand the sentiment but I wonder why its assumed that its not supposed to hurt when someone you love passes away at a very old age.

Now I’ll be the first to admit that I wasn’t the closest relative to my late grandma but the truth is that every single time we spent together over the past years, I could always feel the love this special woman had for me pouring out and showing in her very unique way.

I think of all of us, I got to spend the most time with Gracie Moses (her nickname of unknown origins). Mostly because I would often come back to the village on holidays back then in my school years in Calabar. I’d always be sure to spend some part of my time in Awaka with her because even rebellious teens back then still needed to feel pampered by Grandma’s love. And she took the pampering to another level in her own very special way.

Mama was old school. I am so certain that her own love language was performing acts of service and feeding you till you burst..Chai…who can forget the meals at Awaka!! She’d shuffle around (even with her painful arthritis) to ensure that there was always something hot and ever ready every single time we were around. I mean, it’s the little things you know.

She taught me lots of things as well. It was under her tutelage that I learned the basics of farming. Gracie used to take us to her massive farmland and work the land with us. She taught us how to process garri from scratch. Harvesting the tubers, peeling them, grinding, sacking the mash , and finally frying them to get the sweet grains.. in fact, I reckon I should include cassava peeling as one of my skills in my CV. That became my favorite chore when we had to do them.. Truth was that there were always lots of local girls back then helping out and they were always admiring this cool young town guy who didn’t mind peeling cassava and frying garri…lol

To my eternal chagrin, Gracie would always hover around and make sure they didn’t corrupt her sweet angelic grandson and she’d chase them off once any of them lingered too long after we’d finished. She wasn’t quite as effective as she thought though as I still have some very nostalgic memories of the bathroom stall at the back of the compound with some young nubile girls. Sigh.

Arthritis is a bitch. It caught up with her and slowed her down massively over the years. To the point that she eventually became bed-ridden and had to be taken care of by my wonderful aunt Theresa and later on by my parents when she had to stay with us at our home in the village for quite a while.

So many fond memories of her…She had this thing where she’d give every one of her grandchildren a special name that was hers and hers alone. It was a very endearing gesture and till she passed, she’s been the only one who calls me Azubuike..lol..

We’ll miss you grandma. Thanks for the love, care, memories, wisdom and for just being you.

Sleep well and say hi to pops when you guys surely meet on the other side.

Ps: This is one of my favorite videos of her I took much later on when she was with us.