Unpacking.

 Fam, update on the visa issue… We had to eventually unpack our suitcase.

It's so frustrating that I missed out on this Barcelona trip again. Doubly frustrating that Chioma and I missed out on our planned European vacation this period, triply frustrating that it could have been prevented if we had foreknowledge of this shitshow from the Spanish embassy and quadruply more frustrating that we're going to lose hard-earned money on account of this insanity. 😡

We had to cancel five hotel bookings (Fortunately, two were refundable,one was partially refundable and one was booked by Travelperk) and four flights!!!...GRRRRR!!!😠😠😠

It's enough to drive someone crazy.

In all this foolishness, If there’s one thing we’ve learnt, it’s to never assume that things will go alright as long as you have a green passport.

Very, very unfortunate.

With their wonderful sense of timing, those unfortunate Spanish consulate fuckers finally sent me a message two days ago letting me know that they’ve sent my passport back. I’m not even sure if they approved it or how to feel about it. It’s supposed to come tomorrow.

Anyway, we move!

Learner driver..

 

Hi people

You know, something that never ceases to amaze me is the comparison between the standards of how things are done here in the UK and how they're done back home in Nigeria.

So, after realizing that we might have to get a car soon, I’ve been involved in all the processes of becoming a certified driver. Even though I’ve probably been driving for more than twelve years now, it’s still mandatory to undergo a lot of tests, assessments, and training before these ones here allow you drive a car on their roads.

Bruhh,.. The difference is amazing.

I remember this early article I wrote about driving in Lagos, and cringe in embarrassment now. Omo, we’re just suffering in Naija. 

There are basically three major tests you have to take here. The driving theory test, Hazard perception and actual practical driving test with a certified driving instructor. Of course, you have to pass all three before becoming fully certified to drive. I’m currently studying (Yes, you heard right…actually studying) to pass the theory part and my goodness…The attention to detail these tests consist of, the amount of safe driving practices, the rules of the road and all the other modules just make you realize how God probably assigned a special guardian angel to watch over Nigerian drivers because what we’ve been doing back home cannot be remotely classified as “Driving”.

Lol …. My introduction to driving back then was to just hop in a car with our trusty mechanic Moshood who took me out to a field and just ordered me to go ahead….

Driving over here is sooo different. First you have to get used to the left hand driving position, then there are all the rules of the road you’re mandated to get familiar with, rules of having a road worthy vehicle and then all the hundreds of road signs, road markings, safety practices, incident avoidance maneuvers, and countless other practices that safe driving in the UK consist of. 

The motorways (we call them expressways back home) here are extraordinarily detailed and very well planned. You see things like hard shoulders, rest stops, emergency telephones, digital billboards, speed cameras, and so many other features which you realize are designed to keep you alive. Even the roads are obviously planned well ahead of construction. There are so many safety-related road features that honestly boggles the mind. I used to think it was just Zebra crossing… here you’ll see Pelican, Puffin and Toucan crossing too..lmao

The amount of care and consideration in relation to vulnerable road users, cyclists, motorcyclists and animals on the road is just amazing. I swear I’ve learnt so many things that make me just shake my head in horror at what we do back home in the name of being road users.

Idiot me that used to scoff at having car insurance back then.. Oya nah..come and try it here first and see something. 

One thing in life I’m constantly being reminded of is the fact that learning, re-learning and Unlearning has to constantly happen if you’re to become a better human being. Truly, you encounter so many new ways of living that make you wish things could get better back home. It's just insane

A la Bingo

 Hi folks..

So i think I’ve mentioned it before but it still baffles me how devoted the English are to their pets. 

Dogs and Cats here are not just well looked after, they’re actually seriously considered to be members of the family. I was reading an article about the owner of Pedigree pet food company and how he became the richest member of their already wealthy family because instead of investing in the family’s chocolate business, he decided to specialise in producing pet food and other pet-related services. 

Apparently, the logic is that this would definitely be an ongoing, subscription-model business because of course, pets have to eat and be taken care of health-wise. Obviously, the love which people have for them would always necessitate these products and services… and I swear I’ve never heard anything more brilliant, business-wise.

Compare this with the disdain and nonchalance which most people display towards animals back home and it’s a real eye opener. Really, why shouldn't we be better people and accord better treatment to animals other than ourselves?

So much to unlearn and re-learn.

I was on my way to work one cold day sometime ago, and walked past this park near Snow hill where you see devoted humans walking their pets. (most of them wearing warm animal clothing!!), taking time to pick up and bag their droppings and make sure they stay exercised. Bruh..

At work, there are dedicated Slack channels where pet parents display their devotion to their creatures and I swear, it is truly something to behold. Pictures, commentaries of what they (the pets) did every day, their habits, cute videos, and so much obvious love and dedication to their furry ones.

I also recall the whole UK cancelling and nearly ruining one certain Black footballer’s career because he kicked his cat.

What a time to be alive!! Of course, that’s if you’re a dog or cat in the United Kingdom.

This Green passport life

 It's just a crazy thing innit..?

So, three days ago, I’m lying down on the couch thinking of my life and this reminder just pops up on my phone to re-emphasise the misery which my thoughts are directed towards.

For the second year in a row, I’ve been unable to travel to Barcelona for our annual summer party because, unlike most of my colleagues who can up and go at the drop of a hat, I’m limited to alternative process requirements which involve applying to different embassies to get visas and permissions to travel.

This year’s own is just a clusterfuck of shenanigans.

So earlier on in the year, around May, the company brings out a list of deserving staff who have been selected to spend a week at our HQ in Spain, and I’m on the list. Yaay!!.. So Chioma and I decided to tick off items on our travel bucket list and do a tour of Europe. We still have lots of travel credit (graciously given to us as a perk last year) so we start making plans. Chioma applies to the Spanish embassy for a tourist visa, and since my company usually helps us with the process, I wait to hear from them. Meanwhile, other staff who are going on the trip start making plans and nailing down itineraries, but us Nigerians and Africans who need the visa can’t start doing anything yet.

Nevertheless, with faith, Chioma and I apply and are granted leave from the office and proceed to book flights and hotel bookings in 3 different countries (seeing as there seemed to be no unforeseen issues previously). We plan to spend the week in Barcelona, fly to Rome, spend 3 nights and then go to Milan. Then, 2 days later, fly from Milan to Paris and spend another 3 nights and afterwards return back to the UK.

Now the wahala starts.

The agency which was supposed to help with the process delays for a bit before inviting us to travel to London for a data capture exercise. I take the day off (On my birthday, no less) and embark on a hectic trip to get this done. Meanwhile, Chioma had to apply separately for her visa earlier and pay for the express service.

That’s how we started waiting for the bloody Spanish consulate to approve the visa.

We were supposed to travel on July 6th to Barcelona, and Chioma’s own came in around the 1st. However, as I type this, the fuckers are yet to approve or return my passport. 

That’s how I missed out on the Barcelona part of the plan and I’m praying it comes in today so we can at least make alternate plans in order to be in Spain where our flight to Rome HAS to originate.

Dear God!!

If i say I’m not tired of this shit ehn…na lie. Last year it was a passport renewal issue, this year it’s delay from Spanish embassy.

Not funny at all.

In all of this, it's Chioma I really feel for as her own has come about, but she won't or doesn’t want to travel alone. 

Prayers are still up and hopefully…I can update later if all goes well.