New Years Eve and happy updates.

 Hi

It’s the last day of the year 2023 and what a year it's been.

What can I say…. It's been a mixed bag in terms of positives and negatives, but for us, I definitely count more highs than lows.

Let me start off with a fantastic update to round off a good year.

A couple of weeks ago, the awesome people at Remote where Chioma works confirmed that they would be “sponsoring” her and would issue her a certificate of Sponsorship as a “skilled worker”. Not only did they confirm this, but they also went ahead with a lateral job upgrade to the compliance department from the Customer service role where she used to be.

See ehn… wetin go be your own no go stress you.

Chioma is a blessing. My goodness!! In terms of marriage, I really hit the Mega jackpot lottery here. Aside from all the hard work that she puts in her job, there’s this uncanny blessing that she carries that affects everyone around her… again, Oseburuwa, I thank you for her in my life.

So, instead of going the “graduate” visa route which we would have used after my school year, we applied for the skilled worker/dependant visa route (which is obviously much better) and yesterday, we just got notified of the success of the application and had our visas issued!!!. (Blows trumpet!!)🙌🙌

Yeah.. that IS awesome news….just in case you don’t get the full import, a skilled worker visa is like the holy grail for most immigrants who intend to remain in the UK and people have been known to pay obscene amounts of money illegally to get one. Anyway, we thank God for everything.

Secondly, as a post update to an earlier trip to Birmingham in October which I wrote about here, my job interview at a company (Travelperk, a travel agency) which I applied for, was successful. Again, Chioma’s hand applied here, as I was referred for the job by one of her friends, Sandra (Half of the Agomo family we just visited). The interview process was a breeze (TBH, I’m actually a tad overqualified for the role) and I was asked to resume in November. However, there was a bit of a hitch, as my visa was still the “student” visa which had restrictions on work hours. These great people at Travelperk, realizing that I was too much of a catch to let go, decided to defer my start date till January, so I could sort out the visa issues. Ladies and gentlemen, with the good news about the visa coming through, I’m pretty sure I’ll be resuming with them in January!!! Yaaaay!!

It's not too much of chest thumps and back pats though…the role pays significantly less than what I should be earning, however, it has great career advancement prospects and is right down my career alley in Customer service. Plus, it’s certainly much better than Mama Calabar or all the other popular care jobs which people seem to be convinced are the only jobs for immigrants. Not to dunk on care and support jobs,(seeing the vital role they play) but they’re just not for me. Also, reflecting on the countless rejection emails I've gotten this year alone...biko, I'm all about counting blessings right now.

Consequently, it looks like the good people of Birmingham will have cause to celebrate as they look forward to our relocation over there. It’s going to be a bit stressful logistics-wise, but yeah overall, we’re sure it would be the better decision for us. Watch out for updates.

So 2023 is ending with some good news for us. Again, I’m so grateful for everything so far and in the spirit of positive affirmations, I’m putting it out in the universe that 2024 will be good to us all and declare that we shall all have plenty reasons to give praise to God as we navigate what the future has in store for us.

 

Happy new year and God bless us all.

 

 

 

Christmas Party '23

 Hi everyone,

So, it’s our second Christmas in the UK and in keeping with tradition, aunty Ngozi throws a very elaborate get together for the family members and friends here.

Now now if you know anything about my auntie she's someone who is exceptionally large hearted and spares no expense when it comes to hosting or taking care of visitors. She set up a WhatsApp group for the family and preparations started in earnest. 

We all usually chip in financially to help out but due to some circumstances and their kindness, auntie Ngozi and Uncle Sam decided to take on the financial burden themselves.

Chioma and I had just returned from our Birmingham trip the previous day and went to help set up on Xmas eve. Turns out that some others (Oluchi and Kenny (Oge’s wife)) had been there all day and most of the stuff was already done. Despite her decision to foot the bills, the rest of us had all decided to ignore and go ahead to buy drinks ourselves in order to ensure we at least contributed a bit…so Chioma and I bought a case of red wine for the party.

Oh boy…did it go well or what?

The food was absolutely delicious…the atmosphere was amazing…lots of pictures and videos (trust Aunty Ngo for that)…. Lots to drink and make merry and everyone generally had a fantastic time.

Once more , thank you to the Ebele family and everyone else for their efforts in making sure this period was not so lonely for everyone and may God bless us all.

Buzz off

 Hey guys, I just thought of something, and you know what I most certainly do not miss??

Mosquitoes.

Dear God, thank you everyday for getting those bastards out of my life. Even if its only for the period of time spent outside the tropics, boy, I’m grateful.

I have always hated them… there were times back home when these pests would bother you to death and make the nights a living hell. Mahn, since relocating over here, that horrible aspect of discomfort has been eliminated. Those nasal whines of them flying around, the itchiness of their bites, the phantom itch of real or imagined bites, the anger at killing them and seeing blood splats on your walls, money spent on regular insecticides, the horrible ill health that malaria brings and the mere annoyance of just seeing them in your space at all.

Okay okay..i may be exaggerating it a bit but boy, am I glad that there are no mosquitoes over here.

Holiday trips

 As part of our Christmas plans, Chioma and I decided to take a trip to visit our friends, the Agomos..Chidi Sandra and their lovely son Adim at their place in Birmingham.

This is looking like it has the makings of becoming one of our Christmas traditions…seeing as we embarked on this same trip last year. Another friend, Chinyere was there as well so it promised to be a fun trip. It was also going to be the first time we travelled out of state via train, so checkmark for new experiences.

The journey was great. Got to Euston station and after some enquiry about directions, we found our platform and waited to board…only for me to casually ask a nearby station staff about our online tickets which Chioma booked and he stressed that we had to actually print out physical tickets from the station there…oh boy!! Thankfully our train was just boarding at that point so I quickly went to one of the nearby machines and got our tickets. Good one too cos the ticket inspector actually came to inspect tickets from everyone later on and confirmed that we needed physical tickets for the trip.

Birmingham is a beautiful place and we couldn’t get over how affordable the living costs here as when compared to London. Their house was a two-storey, three-bedroom apartment with spacious rooms, a kitchen, balcony etc and was still about 400 pounds cheaper than what we pay for our one bed apartment in London!!! Hmmmm…

The visit was really enjoyable. Chidi and Sandra are such a lovely couple and their son is just the most precious little guy ever.. Chinyere’s presence always makes things better and overall, we had a really wonderful time.

If things pan out as planned for us in 2024, we are definitely going to be seeing a lot more of them.

Holiday Blues 2

 Hey peeps,

So. we’ve successfully spent our second Christmas here in the UK and to be honest, there’s a lot to highlight about how there's nothing much to write home about…does that even make any sense?

Basically, what I’m trying to say is that contrary to popular belief, Christmas can also be a very lonely period depending on your circumstance or point of view. Speaking as immigrants still trying to find their feet, it can be a really trying period. Apart from all the stress of trying to get your papers sorted (with the huge fees required to do so), there's also the loneliness that hits you every time. Now we are a bit more fortunate than most seeing as we have family members here who you can relate with from time to time.. However, these interactions are very limited; for most of the holiday, you are left to your own devices. London is a lonely place and its so easy to fall into some sort of holiday depression just off the fact that you’re on your own so much of the time and no one seems to care too much about it…. Despite the myriad of things to do, there are so many factors that make this impossible: the weather, money, dampened wills, strangers everywhere and just a general sense of torpor.

To counteract this, Chioma and I made plans not to get too caught up in the holiday blues…we planned a trip to Birmingham to see our family friends and that was a huge success (apart from the fact that I seemed to have caught serious flu from this trip) and we had our annual Christmas get together at Aunty Ngozi’s place which also went down very successfully. Nevertheless, after all this, we’ve been alone at home for a few days now and I believe I’m going stir crazy. The unfortunate part of this is that unlike in Nigeria where you can just decide to jump out of the house and go somewhere, it's not the same here…the weather has been brutally cold and financial restrictions really limit you from doing anything you’d want to. Even though ive accepted it as part of the sacrifices in this phase of my life, it’s still very “somehow”.

It gets laughable after a while because you know many people who’d trade circumstances with you in a heartbeat. Sigh..

 Maybe it’s just the ability to come on here and rant away, or just the fact that I really hate being bored but at some point, I know it's definitely going to get better… and this is what really keeps me going.

After all, it's supposed to be the season to be jolly no?

 

 

Merry Christmas folks!!

 It’s been a blessed year for us and honestly, I’m just grateful for what we’ve achieved and where we are right now in life. Again, so many things to be thankful for. I’ve successfully bagged my Masters degree with a fantastic grade, Chioma’s work is progressing in leaps, Remote (Chioma’s workplace) being the awesome people they are have offered us the elusive CoS (more on this later), I’ve gotten a job offer which is looking very positive, we’ve been in good health thus far…so as I said… much to be thankful for.

No rubbish matching pyjama pictures for us this year even though I strongly suspect that Chioma is going to make me do it one of these coming years.

Anyway, Merry Christmas from me and mine to you and yours!!

All you can eat

Hi guys..

So we were getting bored of the forced indoor confinement necessitated by the suddenly crazy winter weather and decided to do something outdoors.

One good thing going for London is the abundance of places of interest and tons of scheduled events (especially during the festive period). We decided to explore central London and set off towards Leicester square which I heard they had converted into a sort of Christmas/winter sale village.

Got all the clothing layers on and set off via the Bakerloo. It was actually a beautiful place but of course, from the exorbitant prices of the goods there, it was obvious that the major target audience were the abundant tourists who apparently had trooped into London for the yuletide. We went round the place, did a little sightseeing and then decided to set off once we got tired. Now, at this point, we were a bit hungry and seeing as the Chinatown complex was just next door, we decided to grab a bite from one of their numerous stores.

Boy….Chinese people really know how to set themselves up everywhere they are. The place was so unapologetically Chinese. We had actually been here before but it seemed to have somehow gotten bigger. I recall with fondness the dilapidated China town complex at Ketu in Lagos and I laugh in amusement…here’s the real deal.

Last time we were here, Chioma had gotten some quick takeaway from one of the shops but this time around, We ended up deciding to eat in at one of the shops advertising an “all you can eat” buffet and o boy!! It was an inspired decision.

Like an authentic amala joint, the service was that kind of abrupt, straight-to-the-point, get-on-with-it type that makes you instinctively understand that the yumminess of the food would make up for it. The place was packed. We got in though… sat at a table for two, paid the obligatory entry/table fees, got handed two plates with cutlery set and were instructed to help ourselves.

I’m not a novice at buffets and i’m sure the concept of an all you can eat one is not novel but omo, the amount and variety of food choices here were staggering.

 Chioma and I went to town!!

I started off with starters, piled my plate high and dug in. Same with Chioma… Anyway, there’s no shame here o…funny enough, some of the white folks that were eating all around us seemed determined to bankrupt the restaurant proprietors with the way they were piling their plates with food…and going for round after round…na wa o.

Long story short, it was an extremely enjoyable meal which ended up after two rounds for Chioma and round three for me. Wow. The Asians really know their stuff when it comes to their cuisine.

Ended up getting some desert and two bowls of takeaway where my darling wife distinguished herself with her impressive, plate-packing skills. Chioma stuffed that takeaway bowl till it was begging for its life. Lol..

Staggered out and headed back home feeling deliciously full and well sated.

 

God bless the Chinese.

Lolo at 70

Hi All,

Today's post will be celebrating an amazing human being, my loving, caring, devoted, wonderful mom, Lolo Nneoma Eugenia Akunnaya Ibemere.

Guys…you see the person I am today, that’s partly because of the influence of this woman in my life. It goes without saying that this woman sacrificed so much to make sure we were all well brought up, trained, loved and successful at life. Thanks to my parents, we had SOLID values drilled into us from an early age and I believe this has stuck with us so far.

We love you so much mom.

So earlier this year around July, Ugo came up with a plan for us to celebrate her as this year was supposed to mark her 70^th birthday. Of course, the idea caught on with all of us, and plans spun into full gear. After bringing Lolo herself into the picture, we started all the planning, and between Mom and Ugo, most of the preparation, buying, strategizing and whatnot were mostly taken care of in time.

Its just one of the cons of this japa life…everything from our own end was done from far away but Chioma and I tried to be involved in all aspects sha.

From all accounts…It was a MASSIVE success.

So , after some stressful journeys by road, my peeps all traveled back home and together with the great folks back home, we successfully put some befitting events together to celebrate Lolo.

There was a church thanksgiving celebration

capped with the inevitable chop chop party for the villagers and everyone who dropped by and finally, a visit to the motherless babies home later the following week.

Mama, we will never tire of telling you how much you mean to all of us. Your love, compassion, care and discipline are the foundation for everything we know. Our prayer is for God to keep you alive and in good health to enjoy the reward of all your sacrifices and labour.

 

Ladies and gentlemen, please give it up for my beautiful mom, Lolo Nneoma Eugenia Akunna Ibemere. 

Giving back in small ways.

 Hey people

So, some update on events.

Some time ago during one of our library visits, Chioma and i came across an advert requesting volunteers to assist a home library service for the Brent council.

It looked like such a great thing to do and considering that I really enjoy being in the library and its services, we were like, why the hell not? So we went ahead and applied.

Weeks later, I got the mail that I’d been successful (unfortunately Chioma wasn’t) and the whole onboarding process to be a volunteer started.

Bruh…these people are thorough with their stuff.

After one informal but grueling interview with some lovely ladies, I’ve had to get a DBS check done. This is a kind of comprehensive background check with all the authorities to verify your status. Apparently, since I would be getting to meet a lot of people in their homes, with most of them being elderly and vulnerable, they need to ensure that I’m not some sort of closet serial killer.

Suffice to say, I passed the DBS check in flying, spotless colours (being the angelic soul that I am 😇👼) and I’ve since resumed as a volunteer for the Brent Council Home Library service.

Small wins. Yay.

I’m grateful for it because it gives me a chance (no matter how little) to give back to the wonderful Brent Library service where I spent so much time during my school year. Besides, it’s just for a couple of hours weekly and I hopefully get to meet some interesting people.

We are to collect book requests from people who aren’t mobile enough to come to the library and assist with dropping off at their respective houses. My first drop-off was to this lovely elderly Indian couple. They were clearly expecting another of my colleagues, (the usual babe who comes to their place) and were a bit wary at first but they quickly warmed up and even though it ended up being brief, it was a good start.

Well…here’s to serving the community.

 

The absolute Ghetto of Job hunting

 

Hola amigos.

Its been a while…phew… I’ve been busy trying to get post-school life going and mehn..its not been easy at all.

Let nobody tell you any different…getting a full-time job here as an immigrant is most certainly not the easiest of tasks. At one point, I’ve had to create a separate folder in my mailbox to house all the rejection emails from all the companies ive applied to and to be honest, it’s the most frustrating thing ever. As I sit back and watch the mails pile up in that accursed folder, I always make a conscious effort to remind myself that its nothing to do with me and it’s just a by-product of the system here and how it operates.

Bruh. It’s tiring.

If the numerous job search sites in this country are to be believed, it’s not as if there are no available roles o….they are there. Its just that even after all the applications, tests and what not, they always send that stupid rejection email, always starting with some bullshit “thanking you so much for taking the time to consider joining us but unfortunately, we have decided not to progress with your application” speech.

It’s so bad that I’ve been applying to roles much below my skill and competency level. Omo. I just tire.

Funny enough, there is one job offer I have that is still on the table and that is the aftermath of the Birmingham trip I mentioned here but I’m still trying to sort some issues with that one out but the point I wanted to highlight is that this job offer only came about from a personal referral from one of Chioma’s friends who works there. So apparently, unless you get referred, it’s an insane endeavor trying to get a regular job.

Of course, you would hear of all the success stories from people who claim to have gotten it but at some point, you have to start wondering if its real at all. I’ve also noticed that my data looks to have been farmed out to different agents without my consent (probably from all the numerous sites I’ve put up my CV). You’ll wake up and see one email from a strange person talmbout “I saw your cv on xyz site and I think you’ll be a fit for this role I have open…bla bla bla”…omo na scam o. I’ve responded to a lot of these clowns and the funny thing is that ive never heard back from even one of them. I think its time to take steps to remove my data from wherever they’re getting it from.

Sigh.

Biko, you people should help me pray for something good to come up quick cos the frustration is mounting. Small consolation is the fact that I’m still doing the stuff at the restaurant and trying to squeeze in more hours, now that I’m out of term time in school. However, working for minimum wage at this stage of my life just doesn’t cut it with me.

Anyhow sha, this is me putting it out in the universe that I will come back to this post very soon and laugh at all the frustrations with an update of a very good job offer!! And the church says whaaat????

 

AMEN!!

Autumn

 

Hey guys..

The seasons are changing guard once again…. Ladies and gentlemen…say hello to AUTUMN.

It was a good summer, hot, but not as punishing as people predicted it to be..at least here in London.

Elsewhere, it was a different story altogether. We were hearing stories of it being the hottest month on record. WOW. It was so hot that people died from heatwaves, sunstrokes and other heat related ailments… Na wa o.

Here in London, the summer was hot, with temperatures reaching lower 40’s. However, I’ve seen worse and I’m not trying to be insensitive to my lighter skinned brethren, but I would describe my first summer experience as “mildly uncomfortable”.

Anyway, the change of guard has arrived, the leaves have yellowed off and are gradually falling off, duvets have reappeared in homes, wool lined, and heavy-duty jackets have started making appearances on the streets again and that ominous chill in the air is very evident now.

It’s a testament to Nature’s wonder and God’s wonderful design.

You all know I’m not a big fan of the winter season … so preparations have started in earnest, here at the Ibemere household. Chioma has brought out all the jackets and we’ve laundered them, thermal underwear has made a reappearance, the wall heaters in the rooms have been test run for functionality, our boiler is confirmed in good condition, ginger and lemon solutions were recently bought and aboniki will be sourced out very soon. LMAO.

We thank God for everything, for life, for provision and for availability.

 

Bring on the cold weather.

Trick or treat?

 

Of all the holidays being celebrated around the world, I think Halloween amuses me the most.

See ehn, I don’t think the Westerners understand from an African Christian perspective just how much this sort of holiday is considered taboo.

I mean, why on earth would you be celebrating a “haunted” holiday with ghosts, witches, graveyard monsters, and spirits. Accompanied by actively encouraging kids to go about in scary costumes requesting treats from strangers????

Basically, everything our darling African moms warned us about while growing up. lol… You can imagine having a celebration of Ogbanje, Mami water, e.t.c😱😱

I believe it originated from a celebration which was dedicated to remembering the dead. Another origin story was that it was an ancient Celtic festival celebrated at the end of the harvest season. People believed it was a time when spirits could enter our world and damage crops. People all over the old countries would prepare feasts, with places set at the table to make spirits feel welcome, and bonfires lit to keep away unwanted ones.

Africans have been traumatized for generations with our own version of voodoo, juju, babalawos and the like and all these have been ingrained in us from a young age. It’d be a laughable suggestion to dedicate a whole holiday reason for them.  It’s very funny seeing some reactions to the Halloween celebrations from Naija parents over here abroad. i recall the way aunty Ngozi’s face changed when Nadine was talking about celebrating…lmao…biko don’t bring that kind of talk in this house. We are covered by the blood of Jesus!!

Here however, it’s a big deal and a billion-pound industry with every shop cashing out big time from sales of Halloween costumes, sweets, props, toys, and Cinemas raking in cash from Halloween movies and so on. Different strokes I guess.

For me personally, Its actually endearing seeing all the ongoing preparations and decorations. I’ve always been indifferent about stuff like this and I think that, for the most part, my mentality mirrors that of the white people with regards to all things spooky and scary. I don’t understand it but I’ll accept it anyway. I mean what exactly is a hollowed-out pumpkin on your doorstep supposed to mean?

In any case, we’ve stocked up on some sweets in the unlikely event of trick or treaters showing up at our doorstep.

Have a happy Halloween.

Thai.

 Hey guys…nice to be back..

We had our third-year wedding anniversary earlier this month….Yaaayy!!!

Wow.. three years already… Amazing how time has flown by. It still feels all fresh and new still. I guess that’s one of the perks of marrying right.

To celebrate, Chioma and I decided to go somewhere like we always do, so we did some scouting and of course, London, being the never-ending source of eating out places, provided several options. A nice Thai restaurant, “Cooper Thai” caught our browsing eyes, so we decided on it and headed there that evening.

Now, I think we’ve sufficiently established that Chioma is the one in the family with the gourmet, try-anything-once-at-least, international taste buds but once or twice I also like to get out of my gastric comfort zone and try new things as well.

Suffice it to say, it was an inspired choice.

The place was in Harrow and Wealdstone, not too far off from our zanga, so we had just about three stops on our train ride and a little walk in the cool autumn evening.

The exterior of the building wasn’t the best-looking place we’ve ever been to, but on getting inside, there was an abundance of that homey, comfort-filled ambience going on. We were welcomed with some nice Prawn crackers and settled down to enjoy the evening.

Bruh… the food. I think I have become a devotee of Thai Cuisine.

Thankfully, we decided on only one starter platter that turned out to be almost a meal on its own. It came with lots of finger foods, sweet sauces, and tasty veggies

, then moved on to the main courses. I had some Thai fried rice garnished liberally with fried duck meat (Yes…you read right…Duck meat) and other orishirishi. Chioma had some regular rice with a wild seafood sauce platter mixed with decorated veggies, which looked amazing.

Dear Lord..it was heavenly!!

Ticking off our international cuisine bucket list, I think we’ve tried Indian, Chinese, Italian, British (bleh), American, Argentine, and now Thai. Honestly, Thai food wins hands down. It was really good.

We ended off with a crazy, sweet banana split for dessert, containing scoops of ice cream, and drizzled with some delicious frosting.

By this time, we were stuffed to the gills and just managed to make room for it. Of course, we ordered takeaway and rounded up the evening.

Funny enough, the individual food items were very pocket-friendly (which you guys know is an essential criteria for your boy), so even though we did eat quite a lot and spent a bit more than intended, the whole evening was absolutely worth everything.

 

Ahhh…God bless Thailand. You’ve got a convert.

Finishing in style: The Distinction way.

 Hey people

Some piece of news.

*Drumroll*….🥁

After a very very stressful year of school, putting myself back into the academic world of studying, spending hours in Libraries, neglecting personal commitments, attending seminars, writing papers, assignments, and a beautiful dissertation (if I say so myself)…..I am proud to announce that I have officially graduated from the University of East London with a Master’s degree in Human Resource management!!!!!!

To put the icing on top of this, not only have I passed successfully, but I’ve also only gone and graduated with a DISTINCTION!!!!!

Whaaaaaaattt!!! *Trumpet blares!!!*🎆🎆🎉🎉

Sometimes, I amaze myself.

This has been one of the most challenging tasks I set myself and I’m so proud of what I’ve been able to achieve. To be honest, it was no easy feat. There’s so much to be said about studying in the UK, so many things about trying to mix studies with surviving your first year, working menial jobs for only 20 hours per week, getting used to an entirely new system of schooling, adjusting to the weather, new culture and way of life and most importantly, acquiring the right mindset and mental state to get back into the school game after such a long absence. I recall all the rants about it here and here..

Naaah…I try abeg. *Pats my own back and hands myself flowers*🎕

I have so much to be thankful for.

To Chioma….my wife, my babe, my love 💝💝💕…you don’t know how much your love and support has meant during this period. All this would have been impossible without you. (This is a massive understatement btw). Thank you for being there, for the encouragement, for helping to proofread some of the drafts(sometimes…lol), for accepting to be alone all the days I had to spend in the library and times I left to study, for taking the brunt of my bad moods when things were not going too well, for all the financial support which you were (and continue to be) generous with and most importantly, the unwavering belief in my ability to achieve this. You are my world.

To my family…Omo, you guys mean so much to me. I‘m not ashamed to say that a big motivation to get this done was the desire to make you all proud of me and the idea that I would die before letting you all down. I know I’ve made you all proud. (before nko).

Special shout out to my late dad, Nze Cosmas. Like I said in my dissertation dedication, you were the driving force for ensuring that all of us value education. I remember the numerous times you urged us to get more educational achievements and pushed me, especially to achieve potential. I recall once back in secondary school when I came 26^th position in class (the first and only time that ever happened by the way), you traveled all the way to my boarding school in Enugu, sat me down in Mr. Nwanguma’s (my “guardian” back then) house and had one of the most serious talks with me about getting my priorities straight and making sure I live up to my God-given potential.

I have never forgotten all you said dad, Thank you. I’m certain you’ll be up there, bursting with pride and celebrating this achievement with a bottle of Gulder 🍻. Have that drink, pops, this win is dedicated to you.

I’m grateful for some amazing tutors…Prof. Andrew Boocock, Dr. Precious Hepzhibar, and Jude Ritchie…God bless you all for all that you did. You made studying so easy and fun. You’re all great teachers. Andrew, especially…bruh..you be correct guy!

Weirdly, I’m very grateful to the libraries where I spent a lot of time studying. I remember mentioning it here. Stratford Library, Docklands Campus Library, and the fantastic Brent Council Library. These places became like a home away from home and showed me all the values of what a good library can provide. You have all gotten a lifelong patron.

 

Yeah…so it’s all said and done. I look back now and laugh at all the times I felt so stressed while going through school, but like Nze would always say, “Anything worth doing, is worth doing well”.

Congratulations Okey, it was worth it, and you did well.

Msc. Human resources with Distinction!! Cheers!!!.

Middle East peace

 Bruh…when will the Middle East catch a break?

That’s how we were just chilling last week and suddenly the news was flooded with reports about Hamas carrying out a massacre of Israeli civilians in their homes and villages and kidnapping several hostages!!. The bastards actually raided a music festival and gunned down so many people. The pictures, videos and stories are just horrific. Make no mistake about it, an absolutely condemnable, horrible act.

Trust Israel, they did not take this lightly and have launched a full-scale war against the idiots Hamas in the Gaza region, bombing and blitzing the region to pieces for the past week. Unfortunately, there is always a tendency to overdo it and as usual, Palestinian civilians are now caught in the crossfire and facing an extremely serious humanitarian crises of their own. It doesn’t help that Hamas has integrated themselves into the population and seem to be using the Palestinian population as human shields!

To be very fair, there are so many historical perspectives to this feud that it’s very difficult to take a side. HOWEVER, the overwhelming fact is that ordinary, helpless, and most importantly, INNOCENT civilians are being killed, displaced and suffering because of this.

It’s so bad that it has even eclipsed the ongoing Russia-Ukraine war.

I can very clearly remember when I was much younger and monitoring Israel’s war with Hezbollah (in the same region, Lebanon)…this was in about 2006 or so…it was a terrible time as well, and ever since then, this state of constant back and forth has never changed. Always one side lobbing missiles at the other, their Army killing the other civilians, bombs being blown up, suicide bombers, kidnaps and assaults, Hamas dedicating themselves to Jihad and pledging to “Wipe” Israel off the face of the Earth, Israel treating them like the terrorist group that they are, Iran chooking mouth where no concern them, USA supporting Israel with their full chest and it just goes on and on and on…

I’m just here wondering why we can’t all just get along and make this world a better place? Naïve I know but honestly, what good does this even bring about? The hatred is just going to intensify and trickle down to another generation of Israeli-Palestinian kids who will grow up with all the negative things handed down from their parents’ generation.

May God grant much needed peace to that region. Amen

 

 

Warts and all

 Hi guys…

Its serious introspection time over here and honestly, being the continuous work in progress that I am, I’m constantly discovering and trying to correct or come to grips with some icks I’ve uncovered.

So I’ve lately been discovered that I’ve been subconsciously looking down on a lot of the Indian community around the area here in London. Oh God…it sounds even worse writing it down, and it’s so fucking weird because, and I say this with every sense of truth (and irony), This is NOT me. At all. I’m not sure how or why this started but it took Chioma pointing it out and calling me out on it more than once, for me to reflect that I had been doing this by way of making snide remarks and comments, giving pointed looks at some decidedly funny behaviour from some Indians and generally being a bit snooty towards them. I’m not sure why or where this disgraceful behaviour emanated from but I’ve been taking serious steps to course correct. Like I said it’s very weird because most of my classmates in school here are from that lovely country and I have made so many great friends who are genuinely warm folks to be with. Anyway, I’m steady learning and growing so…hopefully this foolishness doesn’t happen again.

This is not a new one, but this procrastination thing is really annoying as fuck. I talked about it here years ago and even though I’ve drastically improved this behaviour, I still find myself wandering back into that crazy procrastination country once or twice when I have tasks to do.. I’m very sure the fuel for this behaviour is the fact that I ALWAYS manage to finish up all tasks before deadlines and not just complete them, but do a kick-ass job of ensuring they are awesomely done. Maybe one day, I’ll miss a deadline and then force myself to kick this habit…sigh.

Finally, what in Gods name is this behavioural tendency to automatically lock up, fall deep in thought and become depressed for days when I get some unfavourable news? I’ve always been able to communicate how I’m feeling at every point, especially to Chioma but this trend has been popping up lately where I’m just not in the mood to talk and it’s been affecting our relationship whenever these bouts come along…. Chioma, being the type who cherishes constant comms (The easiest way to get on her wrong side is to ignore her…lol..) is always at the receiving end of this and honestly, I need to do better.

 

Like I said earlier, it’s all work in progress though and I’m glad I’m able to reflect, identify and take steps to constantly improve. It’s not always easy confronting your demons but so help me God, its what we must all at one point or the other, take time to do.

So there you have it…warts and all…it’ll all get better. I promise.

Milestones Part 3 – “Happy and Thankful”

Hi Love,

So, it’s been 1,095 days of what I can only describe as the best decision I’ve ever made. 1,095 days of getting to know you and love you more. 1,095 days of being your husband and without a shadow of a doubt, 1,095 of the best days of my life.

Ahhhh, what a year we’ve had babe…

I look back at this last year and again, I can only thank God for blessing me with you in my life.

It’s been a crazy year hasn’t it…. lol. New country, new house, new family, new life, new places, new school, new food, and new experiences but through all these up and down changes, one thing that has never wavered has been my love for you. I think I can safely say it increases even more.

It’s not been always rosy my love. We know the toll this past year has taken on us personally, both as individuals and as a couple. However, I can safely say I love how we’ve stuck it out and grown through everything we’ve been through, and I must tell you babe, I’m so very proud of us.

All credit to you babe. You’ve been my rock and a pillar of our family, pushing, supporting, loving, cajoling, and generally being the BESTEST wife any man on earth would be lucky to have by his side. Sometimes, babe, I know that I can be quite the handful…. (Even though we both know I’m quite a catch 😉😉😃) but what your love, presence, patience, and support has done, is to gradually change and make me a much much better version of the man and person I can be. God bless you for me.

I love you so much babe.

I’m so grateful for you and I thank God everyday for the fates that brought you in my life. Like I tell you most times, you are so very easy to love. Infact, as far as I’m concerned, anyone who doesn’t immediately like you is absolute bad vibes and has to be avoided. I also have to say, your personal growth is nothing short of amazing. I have seen you become a much better version of yourself …emotionally, spiritually, workwise and in so many other ways over this past year. My prayer for you is that God keeps blessing, protecting, and uplifting you always.

It can only get better my love. I love how we always talk together about our life plans and as you prayed very recently, this month shall be one that brings favor for both of us.

I will always celebrate us babe. I know that what we have is special and honestly, my love, I wouldn’t want it any other way. Keep being the incredible person you are. You have so much to offer the world and I swear that I will always be right by your side being your biggest cheerleader and supporter through thick and thin.

So, on this special day, Chinky mama, here’s a toast to us: To the life we have, to the love we share, to the future that awaits us and to the very best of growing old together…. May God always envelope us with his love and blessings now and forever!!

Cheers to the next 57 years ahead (or so)!

 

 

  

Analysis Paralysis

 Hey guys …so a recent status check had me reflecting back to a period of our lives when we had so little choice in the forms of entertainment.

I’m talking early years while growing up. It was slim pickings back then. You were either stuck with crappy tv stations, limited choices of books, there was no internet access, mobile phones were unheard of (Goodness, I sound like an ancestor).

Anyway, what brought this on was the situation I found myself in a couple of days ago.

So, I’m seated in front of the TV and absolutely overwhelmed with the amount of options displayed before me. I think I’ve come to understand why it’s difficult for people these days to focus on one thing. It’s a virtual smorgasbord of options.

Normally, our Samsung smart TV came with in-built options of platforms to choose from: Netflix, YouTube, Disney, Amazon, Apple TV, ITv, Rakuten, etc... We then synced Chioma’s Samsung account and got a whole host of new entertainment options added to the mix through Samsung TV platform. Omo, the channel choices choke.

To take it to a further level, I then bought this smart tv box, to get access to live football matches. That was my only innocent intention for the purchase, but I swear, it has taken things to an entirely whole new level. There are options for live tv from more than 9000 stations, Radio stations from more than 100 countries, a VOD (Video on Demand) service storing more than 18000 films, and a Series platform that has roughly 5700 plus different series. Mind you, the VOD and series platforms are always being updated so the choices are always increasing!! WOW.

So, on this fine morning, I wake up early and decide to watch some tv. One hour later, I’m still seated here frozen with indecision about what to watch and trying to narrow down all the temptingly wonderful choices.

Mehn…I miss the simple days of our DSTV compact bouquet.

All this, in addition to the allure of all the social media platforms springing up every day and the numerous novels I have both in physical form and e-copies. Bruh.

It’s not a small something at all.

Musings in motion: Road trip reflections

 

I’m currently seated in a bus…sorry “a coach” travelling down the M1 highway on my way to Birmingham. The greenery rushing by the window side is giving me memories of the several road trips I used to take back home, when going to the village or anywhere outside Lagos. Ahhh fond recollections of God is Good motors or the infamous Jibowu stretch of bus services…

Its so familiar, you could be forgiven for thinking you’re on Ore-Benin highway… only difference is that there hasn’t been even the whimper or bump of a single pothole all through the journey so far, no stressed looking hawkers carrying (my beloved) plantain chips, bottles of water, soft drinks, egg rolls, gala, or any of the million myriad things you’d have them trying to foist on you, no long queues of endless traffic, and significantly, the only thing that has made us stop so far was when there had to be a change of driver at a service station….no tree trunks blocking the road, no burning barrels and certainly no stupid rifle wielding, lunatic policemen forcing you to park to the side with their stupid stop and searches…. God..i don’t miss it at all.

Another amazing thing is that they’ve actually predicted the pick-up and drop off times to a certainty of almost 100%. You book your ticket and they immediately notify you of when the bus will leave the station, and exactly when it will stop at your destination. Pick up time today has been spot on, I’m pretty sure drop off will be too. Coming from those “say a prayer” days of “you go reach anytime you reach” while travelling back home, this is such a welcome relief and is as should be.

I also recall with fondness, my recurring bad luck with seat partners every time I’ve travelled alone and for the first time, seems like luck has changed….This trip i’ve had interesting seat mates, an Australian, rugby looking player who joined me to try and hunt down a non-existent seat number and a very nice lady (seems Danish)who I had to bounce out of the seat I planned on appropriating  when I didn’t locate my seat number… We’ve all been gisting and the conversation has been interesting…apparently, they’re both doing solo travels across countries and exploring as much as they can before the cold months set in… White people are so conversational..its amazing. Divulging so much details about their lives and everything…oh well…

The countryside (I use that term loosely here) is brimming with so many fields of some type of crop and its so beautiful. There are signs everywhere directing you on where to turn off, many well maintained bridges and other road infrastructure (speed cameras, hard shoulders, streetlights).. I’m so sure it would be a joy to go for a long drive here…sigh..

Its been an interesting trip so far….. My seatmates have finally stopped chatting and have dozed off…I’m just staring out the window, lost in thought and psyching myself up for the interview I’m heading to. Wish me luck folks.

hopefully I’ll update with a favourable outcome of this trip at the end of it.

 

"Could you spare a pound?"

 May God forgive me cause I’m not sure what it is about the matter but all I know is that the sight and variety of London beggars always stirs up something in my guts. Maybe it's because in that weird part of your subconscious, you really don’t expect to see the same thing which you’ve been a front-row guest to almost all your life in Nigeria, but don’t get it twisted… London has its share of that part of society and I suspect almost all the countries in the world have the same.

I acknowledge it’s a bit naïve to think otherwise but it’s still a bit jarring to encounter the same thing you see at Ajah roundabout on the streets of Wembley or Hendon. Anyway at the very least, a point of difference is in some of the styles they use to beg for stuff here.. the classy ones will attempt to foist some sort of product (usually very low quality)on you to buy, such as hastily picked flowers, face tissues or other contraption…..the semi crazy ones always shuffle up to you and pitch their sob stories with a straight face and strong entitlement mentality, all the while expecting you to accede to their requests no questions asked… while the crazy ones, always shabbily dressed and obviously high on some shit just do the usual beggar shuffle and outrightly accost you to beg for money. However, there are also the genuine ones who you can tell are really down on their luck and due to the vagaries of this bitch of a life, are just forced to be in that situation. You can find them always sitting humbly in strategic corners, handwritten placards and open hats or bowls in front, hoping for some change.

Another funny thing about most of these groups is that they’re always very specific on how much they want you to give them….. “oi mate, could you spare a pound?”..

Pound ke? Do you know how much pound is changing at aboki??

Leemao.

Substance abuse is everywhere too. The number of beggars high on one substance or the other is also concerning.

We decided to stroll down to McDonalds for a quick after-Sunday-mass breakfast and this weird scary-looking dude starts following us and urging us to give him money. I notice he has a bad case of the “shakes” from whatever drug he was on, so we ignore him and move on but this guy keeps following us (Chioma, Vanessa, and myself) and becoming a nuisance so I turn round and sternly tell him off and he slinks off. About twenty minutes later, this same dude shows up at the McDonalds while we’re eating, pushes up to our table and virtually leans his drooling face above our table (with food on it)  to beg for whatever…I almost lose it at this point and tell him clearly to fuck off. Damn!... About fifteen minutes later, we see him bumming cigarettes outside the car park from someone who should clearly know better..

Same location, same day, same time period, this extremely shabbily dressed (I’m talking obese, junkie shabby. Dirty blanket, undersize exposed bra, panty string hanging out of exposed butt cheeks, coarse hair all over the place), obviously “high” lady shuffles into the place and pretends to order something from the self-service machines. After a quick look around, she comes over to our table and starts talking quick about how the machine is not accepting her order and if I could help her order some food…We are clearly irritated and easily on to her scheme but I indulge and instruct her to go to the counter and resolve whatever fake issue she has. She tries to insist but eventually realizing she’s on a one-chance road with me, she waddles off to another black man in front of another self-service machine to try out her trick.

Three days later, I’m on my way back from school. It's been a long day and an even longer meeting with my project supervisor. My regular route was closed for maintenance so I’m on a different train. My eyes are closed, the rocking motion of the train is hypnotic, and Sade is crooning softly into my earbuds when all of a sudden the interconnecting door between the carriages flings open and this weird Eastern European looking dude steps in. Now I’m seated close to the door so I’m the first person he meets. He screams out something in an unidentifiable language (Not as if I would have known where its from anyway) and falls to his knees in front of me!! He goes on asking and begging for money as he needs to eat and feed his family!!. (In reasonable English now o!)

Unfortunately for him, he’s talking to the wrong person cos I’m from Nigeria which has desensitized us to this form of emotional blackmail.

I open my eyes, respectfully pause Sade’s enchanting voice, remove my earbuds, and deliberately stare at this dude. This stare down continues for about 20 seconds and I do not even utter one word. Na you go tire. However...it’s getting really embarrassing and like his sister from Mcdonalds, he finally realizes he’s wasting his precious time and gets up to move on to someone else.

Honestly, I really hate the fact that Naija (and especially Lagos) scams and fraudsters have turned us all into this distrustful, fatalistic, quick to doubt, double-check-every-story-before-you-help people because in reality, that’s absolutely not who I am. I’m very generous and would love to give as much as I have. (as I do on occasions where I’m convinced).

Sigh. It is well.

 

All tabs open

 Omo, I’m not gonna lie, this school thing sucks!

So we’re in the final stretch and I’ve been working on my dissertation. Bruh its not easy o.

There's so much to read, learn and research. I’m writing a project topic on reward management and staff motivation and I decided to use Nairabet as a case study. (Good choice, if I say so myself)

Turns out that there is no easy topic when it comes to a dissertation. There are countless theories, perspectives, themes, and critical angles to consider as well as all the academic rigour that comes with doing primary research. Luckily for me, the good HR folks in Nairabet didn’t stress too much with giving consent (seeing as it was requested by one of their illustrious alumni…lol)

So I’m in the middle working and I realize that I have three chrome browser windows open and a total of forty six tabs open on my trusty laptop!! Wow.

Some of these tabs are repetitive but most of them have different content and relevance to one or another aspect of what I’m writing about. Na wa o. Apparently, I get better results working when I have multiple sources of input or resources available.

Make of that what you will. Its Monday...i need to get back to the grind.

Chocolates and Perspectives

 There's a lot to be said for different realities for different people.

 So I have this good friend in my class who’s Vietnamese, Thy (Yeah…that’s her name) and for the past few months, she’s embarked on sightseeing around different countries in Europe just for the fun of it. She came to class recently from her last trip and gave me some divine chocolate she brought back from Switzerland.

I’m not entirely sure about her background but it got me thinking about how different people have different perspectives to this thing called life. Apparently, it's sort of a goal for her to see as many places as possible while she can and that’s just so amazing. Meanwhile, I’m here, worrying for the metaverse, just hoping to get a good job, make enough money to take care of myself and family, and try to live a comfortable life.

I know, that’s not necessarily a bad thing, but yet, the whole thing got me thinking and asking myself…”are you really living?”

What happened to your travel dreams? What happened to all the fun you planned to have in life? Surely you cannot keep worrying about everyone else. Honestly, it’s insane how life speeds by really quick and if you blink, it’s gone past in a minute.

It’s obvious I have to put more effort into doing the things I actually love. Chioma has a philosophy which in hindsight now, is absolutely spot on. No matter how bad it gets, she deliberately puts aside some of her earnings to spend on HERSELF and nobody else. It could be a bag she wants, an ice cream, a movie date, a new outfit….anything at all….just make sure you spend it on yourself, doing stuff you love or getting something you like.

Its brilliant and I need to adopt this philosophy.

Pounding the Naira

 

Well… we can't say we weren’t warned…

 Hi guys, it's been a minute. So,as Nigerians, the past few months have been crazy. From the Shambolic elections (INEC Bastards) to Tinubu becoming a selected president to the removal of subsidy(rightfully so but horrible implementation) to our fucking NASS members to the tanking of the economy and finally ladies and gentlemen, our Naira doing very well in the Olympic diving events and taking a nose plunge into the deep end. As of time of publishing this, One British pound could get you about 1100 naira and that is using official channels.

Wait.. what????  

As someone who earns in pounds at the moment, I’m seriously torn between bursting out crying or jumping for joy.

But seriously. What the absolute fuck!!

Things are terribly tough back home at this time and its honestly heartbreaking. You speak to your folks back home and get this sense of despondency about how things are turning out and get this feeling of dread all over your chest. The worst part is that there’s only so much you can do about it. Sending money regularly is the easy part but that’s all we can do right now.

Truth is, even with all the advantages of living in a saner society, there’s still so much to be done, and a whole lot of financial ish to get yourself settled properly in order to be able to help. My school year is gradually coming to an end and the next stages are fast approaching… we need to get visa status sorted out asap and that is no easy feat as well. The minimum wage, 20 hour/week jobs can only be sufficient for sorting out bills and maintaining a living right now, saving is difficult…and so on and so forth.

Mahn..I’m tired

But then, I remember whats going on back home and reflect on how lucky I am. At the very least, we can even afford to send money home comfortably. Last I checked, my weekly shift wage is equivalent to some people’s entire monthly wage back home. Gaddemn.

May God save us.

The process

 This Adult education of a thing sef.

Honestly, this post was going to start off as a rant but I don’t even have the energy to do so. But I won’t lie, it can get very frustrating doing this school thing at this stage of your life.

I’m not sure why, but these days I lack the will or motivation or ginger or whatchamacallit to even pick up my books and study for the semester. I’m having to literally force myself to concentrate in order to get things done when it comes to school matters. Of course, I have been powering through mainly because of the thought of whats at stake for us over here in the UK but honestly, given a choice, it wouldn’t be this school route ever again.

Funny enough, it’s not a matter of capacity or ability. I’m easily one of the best-performing students in the class, no cap. A lot of my classmates are mostly unserious learners or as usual, focused more on being in the UK to continue life irrespective of the means.

Could it be a function of age? other more pressing life matters? general disinterest? It’s weird asf and not at all funny but everything these days just seems to be more focused on getting on with life, achieving financial stability and family-oriented stuff.

Well, not so strange when viewed from that lens but it’s still a point of worry for me.

Maybe it’s because the finish line is in sight or maybe just because I have a really pressing dissertation to get through for the last part of this term. Seeing the fact that the latter is a project that I am fully committed to, I’m just gonna have to roll up my sleeves and get to work.

Anyway, I’m mostly just penning this article down so that, someday after successfully graduating and settling myself, I’ll look back, read this and probably laugh at the tough times i went through.

Ahhh.. back to work!

 

Passing times

 Yeah..

So, as usual, some recent events had me reflecting on things…

I was asked for my email address while on a work call and it elicited a lot of giggles when I called it out.

redhotokey@gmail.com.

Looking back on that call now and the source of the laughs, I can understand the amusement. What in God's name were we thinking back then in forming all those fancy email names we chose? If I’m being honest, maybe the realization of how immature it sounds is because we’re all grown up and mature now, added to the fact that the novelty of emails and all things internet was the rage back then and there was this hype to try and be as cool as possible…

But “redhot”??? (groans in cringe!!!😖😖)

Anyway, it just made me reflect on the fact that life is very transitory. What's hip and cool today could be very much the source of giggles for future generations.

I mean look at clothes. I recall some of the outfits we wore back in school. Baggy jeans, baggy suits, baggy shirts and co were all the rage… Except you’re Idris Elba, go and try it these days and get your ass laughed off.

It's all the same with so many aspects of life.

Social media has gone ballistic. Facebook and twitter and Instagram are gradually becoming “old school”. There's now Discord, Snapchat, and the ubiquitous chief time consumer TikTok.

Clothing has changed, sagging which was delinquent behavior back then has become all the rage

Language is gradually evolving (as should be, I guess) new slangs are popping up every day..”steeze” “drip”, “trenches” etc..

Sigh. Times have to change I guess.

The email thing wasn’t just me, by the way.. almost everyone did it… *ahem… there are some worse ones from people whose names won’t be mentioned (for my physical safety😂😂). You’ll see things like “chillibebe64@xyz.com” or ruby2everly@xyz.co.uk or creamylucci@xyz.com..... Lmao.. everyone had one and I suspect there would be much worse ones too…

Anyway, thank God for growth. Biko, I have opened a new (acceptably mature) email address which I’ll be using going forward on official comms..

Not that it really makes any difference anyway but I embrace it and accept it with all the cringeworthiness and you know what…. redhotokey actually sounds very cool. Lol.

Silver, Gold and Legacy things..

 There’s this saying that overly righteous, God-fearing Nigerian parents used to drum into the heads of my generation back when we were kids growing up

“A good name is better than silver or gold”

Honestly, I have to say… there’s something about it that suspiciously felt like moralistic bullshit to me. It almost always felt like you HAD to choose between one of the options i.e a “good name” OR “silver and gold”. Somehow, it also always seemed to come from the poverty angle and to me, it sometimes felt like it was coined to try and justify the fact that poverty was nobody’s choice and there was something noble about the insane suffering you encounter when you are poor. (Truthfully, it might just be that they were urging us not to engage in any financially enriching activity that would put the family name into disrepute)

Bruh, there’s absolutely nothing noble about poverty o… especially when the suffering comes about from decades of deliberate mismanagement and plain evil greed of leaders who would rather die than see their fellow countrymen and country progress. There’s also nothing noble about poverty when the people spouting this saying have not done anything positive to try and improve their own lives by working hard and doing their own individual best to better themselves and again, I have to stress that poverty absolutely does not justify any form of criminal behavior in the cause of trying to get out of it. (Fraudsters, yahoo, 419ers, criminals, Nigerian leaders so far… na thunder go fire una generation)

But, why can’t I have both?? A good name AND silver or gold or Bitcoin or forex (lots of it) or …anyway, you get the gist.

Anyway, this post is not about poverty or suffering.

The aforementioned saying popped into my head once or twice over the last couple of weeks and on reflection, I recall Nze (God rest his soul) occasionally saying something similar. In truth, we have all seen and have been beneficiaries of the goodwill generated just by being associated with the Ibemere name and this can be solely attributed to the fact the Nze Cosmas a.k.a Cossy Gee was a very good man during his time here with us. In fact, the best of men.

Anyway, it turned out that my cousin Confidence just finished her service year and needed to get a job asap. Now, I have a very soft spot for all our extended family (at least the ones I know) but the Akalonu kids have a very special place in my heart. Their family has been so generous, kind and loving to everyone and to me especially. I practically lived with them for large parts of my life back in my youth (honestly, one of the best periods of my life) and Its been very satisfactory watching them all grow up to become well-rounded amazing individuals who have the same set of positive values we were all raised with.

So, I placed calls back to my folks at Nairabet and that’s when I realized that having a “good name” really has value as an asset. There was no hesitation about assenting to my request and as a matter of fact, they even bent backward to make sure Confy got the spot all because it came from their dear Mr. Okey.

Wow.

The best part of it is that Confy is a fantastic asset in her own right and would make a brilliant addition to the team. So, a win-win all around.

Now, I’m not going to start the false humility bit because I know I really put in the work back then and helped so many people during my time there but it was still a very pleasant realization to know that I have massive goodwill from so many people, further evidenced by all the positive comments which Confy mentioned have been coming to her because they found out she’s related.

Well done Okey! You did something good back there. (*plucks flower and hands myself)

Anyway, folks, the moral of the story is to help others as often as you can and ensure you make a positive impact on everyone you work or interact with by leaving them much better off for having known you.

Also, I think I’ll put my own spin on that saying….

 “A good name is better when accompanied by silver and gold”.

Yes, thank you.